Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Blog-Wars Episode 1

Now in the upcoming posts you may happen to spectate a virtual war all up in this blogworld!!!
Right now I have 2 sworn enemies and for starters I shall start wit Daud El Raud (a.k.a Daud el Japo) and then proceed to one Mama Jacinta (a.k.a Mama-J)

We’ll start wit Daud

Now he commented on my post “what makes a ‘nick’?”…dissed and trashed me real good.
That was the first nuke attack....

But what stood out most, besides the very hilarious( I must admit) comments,is that this nigga actually loves me and expresses his love in via diss mode. (give us a hug David!)

And what was supposed to turn in to a retaliatory diss post, will be a post enlightening you all on who David is and how come we are such friends in spite of all the animosity!

Ok cue “can we feel the love tonight” by Elton John

What makes/is a “david”?

-his name better be David (mwana wa mutinda)
-Well in high school he was a year ahead of me in O’level …however we became classmates in A’Level as he had taken a year off to contemplate on ecological issues.
-He was a top student in his days(10 years ago) and would eagerly teach the form one girls ‘the cell’ in biology
-He wears thick glasses (they kind that are held by tongs on the side!)
-Not nerdy! Despite the fact that he also had a thick fro and don’t-u-dare-touch-my ankles-trousers!!! Personally I think guys were just player-hating
-he is tall
-and handsome:something about that missing front tooth that makes this nigger rugged.
-very meticulous and thorough:from98-now he has taken enough time to make sure his studies are upto date…while most of us take 4-5years to finish a degree…He doesn’t believe in just completing it for the sake …he makes sure he covers every nook and cranny!!!!…and soon he will graduate summa-take-a-their-time-a-laude…
-He loves to play basketball…however if u were to watch this player in his game you’d swear he was playing netball… (yes, david aim wit the palm, uh huh…throw…swish…curtsey for the crowd!!!)…rumor has it hop-skotch and rounders were his forte as well
-He is funny and hilarious
-Has guts. Not many would challenge the great nicholasgichu to war( cue the lightning and thunder!!!!)
-He is True Kenyan… he has been in the States for so long and is coming back…dying to come back….he could care less that his visa expires in June…he wants to come back!!!
-He ain’t fake!!! Went to the States and he has a cute British accent. U know the kind where “Harry Potter” is pronounced “ Hairy Pott-Uh”
-and as much as he hates me he really is a true fan!!!!
-He is also in the closet!!!! He can deny it. Fight against it. Disown… this brada is a BLOGGER!!! I’ve begged him to get a blog…he declines! My fans have requested him to blog…he declines! But still, he is always on my blog raising hell..posting well…and in fact has his own following…(which better not be more than mine I hope) need I say more...he is one of us!!!
-He is a polite chap-despite him thinking he grew up in the hood wit a rap influence and ghetto talk! He knows his manners, and is a teetotaler…no booze just give him his cup of tea and he’ll be fine
-Was a choir-boy till he left for the States and I hear his solo-performances would bring the church down!!!
-He is your regular average kinda joe; a lil deodorant wouldn’t kill him
-his dressing skills leave a lot to be desired; I’d once written about him still wearing P.E t-shirts in the States…Bata Bullets and ngomas…he is reinventing Kenyan Culture those sides…

All in all he is my buddy…and so as this war begins…at least you all have an idea of who the players are: let the games begin!!!!


Anonymous Mama JunkYard said...

Tempted as I am to insult you - I must say that you have written a really lovely post.

I know that I am one of those people who come here not for your posts but for Daud's comments. I can honestly say if there was no Daud...I wouldn't visit your blog...ever.

3/30/2005 2:31 PM  
Anonymous mshairi said...

Aint that just lovely? The two of you are lucky to have each other as friends.

What else do we need to do to convince you to start your own blog, Daud? I think you write very well (not as well as my nephew, mind:-) and I am always entertained by your comments. I promise to visit daily:-)

3/30/2005 3:35 PM  
Blogger kashata said...

You 2 need to get a room.Seriously thoughlol@the p.e tshirt still being worn,nice post Nick!.I agree Daud needs to start a blog or unleash the address of his existing one cos his comments are harsh and too funny.

3/30/2005 5:26 PM  
Blogger KymmBr. said...

okay okay folks. here we are, ready to behold a great war between our very own MJY, Nick(a.k.a Gichuru..) and one Daud El whatever...
Nick, just do me one favor...appoint me the ref. i promise not to favor any side. i promise to act ruthlessly so yu can win. and i promise if yu loose...i will be willing to let yu join my blog.
am earnestly waiting for a reply to my applivation. hope yu donn need a yu now? but ofcourse am doing it for free..SO LET ME BE THE JUDGE!!!

3/30/2005 8:14 PM  
Blogger s! said...

wololo.. the war-cries have been cried, the battle-lines have been lined! now me i'm going to get my popcorn, my comfy lazy-boy and enjoy this one!! let the games begin!

3/30/2005 9:28 PM  
Blogger Afromusing said...

heh! Daud wears bata bullets!, i also proudly rock my green bata bullets, i just got a pair of white ones...iam sooo excited. Daud please please blog! As for the war, as long as there is no 'collateral damage' i shall spectate!

3/31/2005 1:42 AM  
Blogger Nyakehu said...

Oh Nick I really wondered about that Daud and it is nice to hear you call him a friend after his bouts of nastiness to you. No wonder youneed our family protection as we shall annihilate(sp) him for you.

3/31/2005 2:44 PM  
Anonymous Memoire said...

No retreat no surrender! Eh but all in jest of course? Lakini dont sahau the movie reviews stuff we love them

3/31/2005 4:36 PM  
Anonymous Daud said...

I swear Nicko... The gloves are off,
Ati give us a hug ( uuuughhh!....shaking with disgust). Let
me get rid of the imagery before I get traumatised.
What did I tell you in the previous post... Take off the skirt!!!

Now to debunk your lies
- I was not a year ahead of Nick. I was 3 years behind
and I used to kick his ass every chance I got.

-Nicko trying to ingratiate yourself to me won't make me any less
hard on you. Try that on someone else.

-I do not wear glasses!!!!! They are shades.

-Not Nerdy is right and stop projecting your ankle trouser
fetish on me.Freakin weirdo!

-Tall according to Nicko. Keep in mind Vern troyer (Mini Me)
looks like a giant to Nicko.Yes Nicko is that short.

-Look at Number 2

-rugged is right

-Nicko I graduated a while back. even though is was Thank-You-Laude.
(Yaani just barely graduated).

-There goes Nicko Lying his ass off. I dunked on this Negro so many times
that Jamas started to call him 'basket', all the balls passed through his face.
He gave up and went for netball( hence his reference to netball) where the ladies
did the same. A regular 'girlie man' if you ask me.

-I told you flattery will not make me any less servere on you.

-The Great Nicholas Gichu Indeed. Give me a minute to stop laughing.

-As long as you are still in Kenya, there is no way I am coming back.
I can not afford to be associated with your kind of riff raff. Hell
send me to Iraq.

-I do not have an accent, British or otherwise. Just more lies from Pinochio here.

-I am closet nothing.

-Polite!!!!Knows his manners? Nicko who are you talking about? I keeps it gangsta(doing the hood hop as I speak).

-Choir boy?! Nicko pass me some of that stuff you have been smoking.

-Regular is cool, compared to your deviant behind Mr. BDSM

-Oy!!! don't knock bata bullets and Ngomas, Them is good shoes. I have the same Ngomas from my days in high school and they are as good as new. Just say you want a pair. Go on, Nick .Say it!!!

Buddy Shumddy!!! I do not know this Negro from Adam.

Now that I have debunked your lies, Next time I am coming after
you! Aaah it brings back memories of a beat down( or a war as you like
to call it, Suit yourself). Nicko you going to get you ass cyber whooped and handed back to you!

Feelanga free and join the beat down('war'). The more the merrier

Show em ma motto!!!( I stole that from sprite)

Daud El Rude(Feelanga Flamboyanti!!)

3/31/2005 7:33 PM  
Anonymous Mama JunkYard said...


Tuko pamoja...seeing as Nick has turned my whole family against me.

3/31/2005 7:44 PM  
Blogger s! said...

like Ndali'n P once claimed.. we are all here to mboof mbaff nicko yo!.. you're going down jamaa, chini kabisa!

3/31/2005 11:51 PM  
Anonymous Benre said...

standin' for nick. can let that happen to ya. can understand where this dude is comin' fro.
take a day off n mourn w/ our catholic brethrens.da most beloved pope john paul ii just passed couple of hours ago.not a catholic myself but like the guy n what he stood for.thin' mwana wa nze' has a just?how old's this guy nway?hav n nice wkend

4/03/2005 12:25 AM  
Blogger jm said...


Hii ni draw!! Wacha nisome part 2, hehiii!!

6/23/2007 12:41 AM  

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