BLOGGING GAMES

I’ve been around this social scene for quite a while and I almost thought I was burnt out. Boy oh Boy there is a new crowd and they are moving in and taking over our old place. We have become proverbial has-beens and we can’t do anything about it. There’s a new generation blooming-time to create room and diversify! I’m quite impressed with the new lot totally interactive unlike our old generation that clung in droves…and by them droves we are drowning. So here I am to revitalize ourselves and reclaim our blog-land. OLD KBW’s unite! Let’s show them how this was done back in the day!

So instead of an April fool’s Post Lets talk about the blogging game…also inspired by a recent post by KenyanGal..(could you come take a walk with me...eeeee)

1. Blog-Ho’ing: The art of visiting most bloggers and commenting.

Remember the likes of MJY and GUESS who had been so around they were a circle! The kind neighbours welcoming new neighbours with a warm cup of tea and a basket of fruity gossip!

2.Blog-Stalking: The art of commenting even before the blogger is through editing.

Yaani the blogger is more persistant than your avatar! e.g Msanii…was always there even, before u edit your post a second time that punk was all up your comment section! Speed dial? Jobless? Sure racing to a post raises tension and gives sike to the blogger. Of course there is that annoying race Guess and I started, which I perfected by first commenting “1st here” and reading the post later. It just happened that Guess and I would be reading Milo’s post the same time and the one with the shorter comment would land at #1. Another blog we’d run to quickly was Mutumia’s…it was Fast and Furious and First and hence the coining of FFF!

3.Blog-Wars: Declaring nuclear war in the hope of annihilation and humiliation of your opponent blogger.

OH, how I miss them! Pick on anyone and let them have it!

4. Blog-Romance: The on-page romance between two consenting bloggers!

Beauty was in the eyes of the bloggers. Remember the Loves of last year? What happened to on-going chemistry between bloggers: Acolyte and Haidhuru? Ms K and Thinker and a certain slice of “cake?” Sandman and Stunnuh? Poi and Kymmbr? Guess and Milo? Akiey and Kidada? Cammon revive them flames! Bend over like in an up country jiko and blow…fan them fires and revive them dying embers.

Back then I had a wife and a mistress and a concubine…despite inadequacies and shortcomings I was doing alright but talk about not keeping up with the young lot nowadays!

5. Comment Commandments:Rules of engagement a.k.a etiquette

-If you do/did not read the post, at least let it not show in your comment. Don’t pick the first or last paragraph and ride on that...thou shall comment in totality
- A smiley or an LOL...unacceptable!!!
-Commenting is like Dating: Thou shall go around and come around! Thou shall not just accept comments and not have the decency to go over and comment…and comment again and again. Be a decent date! If taken out return the favor as well! Thou is not a one-night stand…one comment constitutes the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
-Comments are like love and thou shall grow with love. More importantly thou shall love one another as u wish to be loved.



6. Know your blogger. To avoid misconceptions and to avoid humiliation.

-Afromusing is not a dude but a fair maiden…but remember those hands back then?
-Mshairi may be as energetic as a two-year old. Hip and with it like the rest of us…but she is Aunty Mshairi to you thank you very much.
-Thinker thinks…ebu try a blog war with him and thou shall get it worse than a proctologist could ever give it to you! Thinker will rally his orange blog movement crowd and skin u alive and burn u at the alter.
-Nakeel is not an Asian chick!

--Remember when some guy was chatting up Sandman cause ati his eyes were feminine?
-Know your difference between AfroM/AfroFem…A-musing/K-Musings…WM/WMK…tafsiri/maarifa…nick/tato…



7) Oh my Gawd Blogs! These are those blogs that have total anonymity and hence the bloggers have nothing to lose by giving you a peg to hang their dirty laundry.

Nothing brought in ratings like these. Ms K was kinky in her Pretty in Pink blog. Sunflower was your Kenyan Terry Macmillan getting her groove back in Jamaica. Guess was at volcano lava temperature at times…and the funny thing is on KBW the gents are more reserved and some Ladies little…er…cough...little less reserved with a splash of nymphomania salad served with an all you can eat buffet with a glass of carnivorous wine!

8)Stereotype blogs:
(We shall use movie titles to define)

-The sweet damsels with girlie posts as Aco would say. Blogging while Sleepless in Blogland…or the Shakespeare’s in Lust
-Those with Logs of a mad, black, woman waiting to exhale
-The macho ones, Chronicles of Naniii(stolen from KM) / Return of the Lion King/King Kong with a delta force attack mode. Experienced/Authoritative with more mojo than Austin Powers!
-The ladies with License to thrill, with Boomerang love stories and bitter sad endings even after two playing that game. They know that there is a thin red line between basic instinct and fatal attraction…
-The personal Bridget Jone’s Like entries that will not entertain outside criticisms or ridicule.
-Those with Artificial Intelligence or Jurassic Experience ( I miss BluePoet) or like mine Much Ado about nothing

Love them or hate them we read them!

9) Silent Bloggers. Always there without a word.

The ones you think never read your blog but know it inside out e.g. Maitha and Torments…tihihihi and the happen to be the nicest guys who are the easiest to bully…mtado???


10) Bloggers Addiction. The undeniable secret pleasure derived from this activity.

Funny thing none of us are in denial…we love it love it. And these are the following signs of Addicts

Blog Block: A moment where one is uninspired by surroundings to blog or post. The truth is it should never matter what you post.
Blog Rivalry: Competition with like bloggers.
Blog Collabo: Ways of having two posts out there at the same time, also a form of rivalry.
Blog Hiatus: Going to rehab to come back reloaded.
Blog Families/Couples: People not in denial embracing their addiction….
Blog and another Blog: Need I say more?